Trusted politicians assure world bin Laden dead

Leaders: we have proof bin Laden is dead, but you don't.

Several members of America’s most trusted institution, the U.S. Congress, have assured the country and world that bin Laden is dead but that no one really needs evidence of it.

Arguing that there is proof, without showing anyone this proof, House Minority Whip Steny Hoyer (D-Md.) explained that it’s important for elected leaders to see the pictures but that “regular folks” can’t be trusted with the same.

“There’s absolute proof that Osama bin Laden is dead, which proof we’ve declined to show anyone,” Hoyer said.  “But trust us, it’s there, we promise.”

Senator Scott Brown, R-Mass., has said there is no reason to further inflame “the sensitivities of the Muslim and Arab world” by releasing the photos.

“The government should avoid exposing people to things that might upset them,” Brown said.  “If we can instead hide things from the public and protect them from their own volatile emotions and thoughts, that’s the path we should take.”

Some commentators have pointed out that even if the pictures were released, there would still be claims they were fake.  “Conspiracy theorists around the world will just claim the photos are doctored anyway,” said Republican House Intelligence Committee Chairman Mike Rogers.

Continued Rogers: “For the same reason I’m not so sure we need to worry about public access to government records and documents, since those, too, could be doctored.”

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