U.N. shocks world by revealing it still exists

The U.N. voted Thursday to meddle in another country's business.

As the United Nations Security Council voted Thursday to approve a no-fly zone over Libya, analysts expressed surprise that the U.N. still exists.

The U.N.’s decision to impose “all necessary measures” to save Libyan civilians was critical, as nothing in the world happens with any legitimacy unless the world body approves.

It’s unclear where the U.N. has been the last few years, and diplomats from the United States and elsewhere could only guess.

“My best estimate is that the United Nations recognized there wasn’t already enough meddling in other countries’ business and that the world could use some more of it,” said Ben Clyburn, an official with the U.S. State Department.  “Thankfully, the U.S. and other nations will now be involved with yet another conflict in the region.

Some reports indicate that since the decline of the Oil-for-Food program, the U.N. has needed a new source of income to make up for all the member dues it wastes.

“Let’s be honest, times are hard and we can only buy so many solid gold limousines and rare French truffles with the money we get from member nations,” said Janice Schmidt, U.N. Undersecretary for Budgetary Planning.  “So we’ve been busy finding new ways to make money, and new things to spend it on.”

Since 2003, the bulk of the work done by the U.N. has been remodeling its cafeteria, reprinting old documents in Wingdings and other fonts, and coming up with multi-volume reports on how people should arrange the furniture in their homes.

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